Adventures in academic excellence - a profile of Kansas State University

Let's see, who is on the schedule this week? Oh, Kansas State that famous outpost of learning that has launched the career of many a astronaut big box retail employee.

For nearly as long as I can remember, K-State football has made it's living by recruiting junior college players. The kind of guys who probably couldn't be admitted to any other accredited university in the country are routinely welcomed with open arms onto the K-State campus. This amazes, and exasperates me. I don't mean to be an "elitist" or anything but, let's be honest, so-called "junior colleges" are essentially the sub-prime mortgages of the education world. They accept every miscreant who walks through the door, rarely get paid, and ultimately threaten to topple the entire education system with their reckless and unqualified student bodies. Ultimately and predictably, they'll be asking us to bail them out - of jail, that is.

Quick poll:
Your average junior college instructor is:

a) fulfilling a court mandated community service
b) selling dope
c) trembling in fear
d) wearing a kevlar vest
e) all of the above

(The answer is "e". If you are a junior college student, you answered "7")

This year's K-State rosters is perhaps the most JC-rific lineup of all times. A quick scan through the team's website reveals 37 players who have come to KSU via JCs, CCs and similar institutions just this side of state prison. Behold the alma maters par excelence:

Harbor CC
Santa Barbara CC
Coffeyville College
Garden City CC
Butler County CC
Tyler JC
Independence CC
Hutchinson JC
Miss. Delta CC
Johnson County CC
Emporia State
Rainy River CC
El Camino CC
College of San Mateo
Santa Rosa JC
Copiah-Lincoln CC
Sacramento CC
Compton CC
Bakersfield College
San Francisco CC

Ahh, the swelling pride that must be felt by a K-State booster as he gazes upon the student-athletes who represent his school. His other source of pride is the handsome and inspiring mascot, Willie the Wildcat:


May Buddha ave mercy on your soul, K-State.